Perspective

It's strange how I tend to forget what it's like to be ill now, but then when an illness jumps on me I'm dragged down even more into the depths of its misery.

This academic year, I've only been ill three times - one Swine flu-type thing, one bad normal flu which involved my voice disappearing before the Spanish Oral exam, and now this. Mainly a cold, but with the side-effect of constant fatigue. I'd liken it to having miniature weights attached to my eyelids rendering me practically unable to keep my eyes fully open.

However, this is nothing. This is a minor illness that will pass in days and will leave me feeling nothing more than relieved in the end. I'm lucky, I know it. Even in the years when I had a poor immune system, it was minute compared to Lucy's condition. I can't complain about whatever ailment I may be suffering at the moment, for suffering is not the word. Lucy is the one suffering; I'm incredibly fortunate to not be in incessant, unbearable pain.

So, now I put things into perspective. I have no right to complain.

Dear Lucy,

Today's your birthday. Well, it should be. You should be having a party at the weekend, opening all your rainbow-coloured pencils and generally being incredibly happy. But you're not.

Five days after your 14th birthday, you fell victim to a baffling and rare ear problem. This Monday you will have been ill for two years. You've missed some of the most dramatic, stressful yet amazing times so far. It just hasn't been the same without you.

In reality, it's not your 16th birthday tomorrow. You haven't even had your 15th birthday. Chronologically, you may be 16, but I know that really you haven't even had the chance to live your life properly as a 14 year old.

When you get better, I promise you I'll make both birthdays special. We'll have a huge party, celebrate your new lease of life and get you back on track. I'll be here for you throughout, always. I'll do everything I can to help you repair this.

I just hope you're not too upset today. Remember: today isn't your birthday, it's just another day. But some day, with any luck in the near future, it will be. And things will all be on their way to being okay again.

Sending you love, happiness and good health,
Abby
xxxxxxxxxxxx